Maxwell's Silver Hammer
by Aisha Iwakura
Summary: Songfic for the Beatle's song "Maxwell's Silver Hammer", what happens when Duo goes on a killing spree?


**  
  
  
Maxwell's Silver Hammer, by Aisha Iwakura**   
  
  
_Joan was quizzical, studied pataphysical_   
_Science in the home_   
_Late nights all alone with a test tube_   
_Maxwell Edison majoring in medicine_   
_Calls her on the phone_   
_"Can I take you out to the pictures Joan"?_   
_But as shes getting ready to go_   
_A knock comes on the door..._   
  
Hilde sat at home alone, test tubes and papers cluttering her desk. She   
scrunched up her nose, trying to concentrate as she poured red liquid into a   
test tube of green. Suddenly a small explosion sounded, and Hilde cried out   
in fustration as black smeared all over her face. Suddenly the phone rang,   
and Hilde reached over, and picked it up. The screen split down the middle   
showing Duo at a payphone in the hall near Hildes front door. "Hello?" Hilde   
asked. "Hey Hilde," Duo said. "Wanna come out to the movies tonight? I just   
got my paycheck." He smirked, glancing over at Hilde's front door. "Sure Duo,   
let me just get cleaned up, and ill meet you at the movies ok?" "Alright   
Hilde." Duo said, hanging up. Hilde got up, and ran to the bathroom,   
showering quickly and putting something nice on. She walked to the door,   
grabbing her purse on the way. She opened the door to find Duo standing   
there, a hammer clutched in his right hand. She screamed, as Duo brought down   
the hammer on Hilde's skull.   
  
_Bang,bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Came down upon her head_   
_Bang, Bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Made sure that she was dead_   
  
Duo grabbed Hilde's body as it fell, blood dripping on the floor from the   
hole in her skull. Duo was positive that she was dead, as he dragged her down   
the hall, a blood trail left on the carpet. He dragged her into her room,   
opened the closet, and tossed her inside. Hed worry about the cops later. He   
wandered into the kitchen, and fixed himself some dinner. After that, he   
walked into the bathroom, and washed the blood covered hammer. He kept   
suprisingly calm that night, considering hed just murdered his room mate. He   
yawned, tired from that day. He walked to his room, and fell asleep almost   
instantly on his bed. _  
  
Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again_   
_Techer gets annoyed_   
_Wishing to avoid an unpleasant scene_   
_She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away_   
_So he waits behind_   
_Writing 50 times "I must not be so.."_   
_But when she turns her back on the boy_   
_He creeps up from behind._.   
  
Duo woke up that morning, Hilde's body stashed in the closet. He showered   
quickly, and got ready for school. He ran out the door, Hilde's body still   
slumped in the cramped closet. About 20 minutes later, Duo sat in his first   
period, boredly throwing paper wads at the back of the teacher--Mrs.   
Dorlian's--head. Mrs. Dorlian turned around, and caught Duo throwing paper   
wads at other students. "Duo! Since you like having so much fun at school, I   
suggest you stay after school!" Duo just smirked, patting the hammer in his   
pocket. That day, after school Duo sat there, and started writing 50 times on   
the board, 'I will not throw paper wads." When Mrs. Dorlian turned around to   
get something out of her desk, Duo grabbed the hammer, and lunged for the   
teacher. A scream was heard through the halls as the hammer was brought down   
on her skull.   
  
_Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Came down upon her head_   
_Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Made sure that she was dead_   
  
Duo caught the teacher as she fell, tucking the hammer back in his pocket. He   
dragged her out of the classroom, and into the hallway, looking for a good   
place to hide the body. He spotted the janitors closet, and he opened the   
door, throwing her in. He closed the door, and leaned against it, looking up   
and down the hall to see if anyone saw him. Suddenly, red and blue lights   
flashed through the window above the janitors closet. Duo blinked. "Crap! The   
cops are here!" He ran down the hall, ignoring the cops yelling through the   
bullhorn. He ran towards the back exit, but stopped as soon as two cops ran   
in through that door. He began to run the other way, but the officers grabbed   
him by both arms and forced him into the handcuffs. Duo glared, as he was   
dragged out of the school, hands cuffed behind his back.   
  
_B.C thirty-one said "we caught a dirty one"_   
_Maxwell stands alone_   
_Painting testimonial pictures_   
_Rose and Valerie screaming from the gallery_   
_Say he must go free_   
_The judge doesnt not agree and he tells them so_   
_But as the words are leaving his lips_   
_A noise comes from behind..._   
  
Duo stood in the courthouse, his eyes fixed on the floor. He looked up as   
soon as the judge entered. The judge walked to his podium as one of the   
officers beside him said, "Judge Yuy presiding." Judge Yuy sat down, and gave   
the handcuffed Duo a Yuy Glare of Death (tm) "Duo Maxwell. You are charged   
with manslaughter. I sentence you to eternity in jail." He banged the hammer   
against the table. He looked where Duo was supposed to be standing but he   
wasnt there. He blinked, and heard a scuffling noise behind him. He turned   
around, and saw Duo raise the hammer, and bring it down on Judge Yuy's skull.   
Judge Yuy slumped over on his poduim as Duo was jumped by 5 cops at once. Duo   
yelled out for help, and he felt someone shaking his arm. "Duo?" He opened   
one eye to stare into the face of Hilde. "Duo, you were having a bad dream,   
are you ok?" Duo blinked. "Uh, yeah im fine." Hilde walked out of the room,   
as Duo started laughing. He immediatley stopped laughing, as soon as he saw a   
silver hammer on the nightstand, a puddle of red underneath it.   
  
_Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Came down upon his head_   
_Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer_   
_Made sure that he was dead_   
  
*end*   
  
hehe, i was on a sugar high when i wrote this....@.@;;   
  



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